So today I was giving the lil guy a bath and he was happily playing with his toothbrush and a face cloth. All I could think was...what is he imagining? He was giggling as he poked his face cloth down with the end of his toothbrush and I wished with all my heart I could crawl into his mind and see the things he was seeing. It also made me reflect when as a newborn his eyes would dart around in his sleep and he'd make all sorts of expressions, smile, and cry. I couldn't even begin to imagine what a baby a few days old would be dreaming about.
A lady in my birth club on babycenter.ca posted this article which she received from her mother. I think it's absolutely amazing and hits the nail on the head. Mothers will completely relate with this article and those without will get some sort of inkling what being a mother is like. http://www.breastfeeding.com/reading_room/change_your_life.html . I warn some of you though...it's hard to keep a dry eye.
So this was more a tender side of me...don't worry...the comedian will return.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Ack what time is it???
So I sit here a little ashamed. Was it really August when I last posted??? Is it really and truly November now?? Did I not claim to blog faithfully??? It was, it is, and I did and failed. So here I am, humbled at your feet, begging you all to forgive me (like there was an all).
First and foremost I'll give you my thin, weak, and most pathetic excuse for not blogging in awhile. I've been busy! I have since returned to work, worked somewhat on the wedding, and planned, executed, and celebrated a 1st birthday. It's been a lot of work and I've been lazy.
The crib midget celebrated his first birthday this past Tuesday. I actually planned out a party, handmade the invitations, bought decorations, made food, and entertained. For a girl with a lack of creativity and zero artistic skills this was a lot of work. Each invitation was a foam white paw print with blue paw pads announcing the son's first birthday and theme being polar. His polar bear cake was the first I've ever decorated and I have to say, it didn't turn out half bad. Complimenting the cake was a dozen cupcakes all done up to look like penguins, which again I made. That wasn't the hardest part at all though. The hardest part was one in which only mom's would understand.
While you're super excited about the upcoming birthday a piece of mom's heart breaks when she thinks of her little one celebrating his first anniversary of life. It's been a whole rotation around the sun since someone put that little bundle in your arms and said...go forth and fend for yourselves! You realize you miss the smell of mother's milk/formula on their breath. The sweet smell of their hair. The way the used to curl up in your arms and fall asleep. You even miss the private time late at night with only the two of you in the world. Now you have a walking, somewhat verbal, little person who leave wreckage in its wake similar to that of a strong hurricane. They're fun and you can play with them, but they're not that little baby handed to you a year ago...now they're a little boy or girl...and it leaves mom mourning for that little one again. No I don't want another baby! Not now anywho, I just miss my baby being my baby :(.
The wedding!!! We musta fed it after midnight because now it's become a monster! We have a site. I have a maid of honor. The MOH's hubby is doing the music for the reception. We have approx 120 guests...and we have 5 months!!! We also have a dress.
Oh the dress! I fell in love with this purple chiffon bridesmaid dress and said...yes! Let's order it in ivory. It has returned, in ivory and...I dunno how I feel about it. Hopefully once they steam out the wrinkles, I steam out mine or at least bind em back in restrictive underwear (yes I'm referring to my fat as wrinkles), and it's fitted to my body I'll be blindsided by how absolutely wonderful it is. Right now I think of it as a creamy offwhite nightgown that I stole off some roman chick who's bigger than I. ARGH!!!
First and foremost I'll give you my thin, weak, and most pathetic excuse for not blogging in awhile. I've been busy! I have since returned to work, worked somewhat on the wedding, and planned, executed, and celebrated a 1st birthday. It's been a lot of work and I've been lazy.
The crib midget celebrated his first birthday this past Tuesday. I actually planned out a party, handmade the invitations, bought decorations, made food, and entertained. For a girl with a lack of creativity and zero artistic skills this was a lot of work. Each invitation was a foam white paw print with blue paw pads announcing the son's first birthday and theme being polar. His polar bear cake was the first I've ever decorated and I have to say, it didn't turn out half bad. Complimenting the cake was a dozen cupcakes all done up to look like penguins, which again I made. That wasn't the hardest part at all though. The hardest part was one in which only mom's would understand.
While you're super excited about the upcoming birthday a piece of mom's heart breaks when she thinks of her little one celebrating his first anniversary of life. It's been a whole rotation around the sun since someone put that little bundle in your arms and said...go forth and fend for yourselves! You realize you miss the smell of mother's milk/formula on their breath. The sweet smell of their hair. The way the used to curl up in your arms and fall asleep. You even miss the private time late at night with only the two of you in the world. Now you have a walking, somewhat verbal, little person who leave wreckage in its wake similar to that of a strong hurricane. They're fun and you can play with them, but they're not that little baby handed to you a year ago...now they're a little boy or girl...and it leaves mom mourning for that little one again. No I don't want another baby! Not now anywho, I just miss my baby being my baby :(.
The wedding!!! We musta fed it after midnight because now it's become a monster! We have a site. I have a maid of honor. The MOH's hubby is doing the music for the reception. We have approx 120 guests...and we have 5 months!!! We also have a dress.
Oh the dress! I fell in love with this purple chiffon bridesmaid dress and said...yes! Let's order it in ivory. It has returned, in ivory and...I dunno how I feel about it. Hopefully once they steam out the wrinkles, I steam out mine or at least bind em back in restrictive underwear (yes I'm referring to my fat as wrinkles), and it's fitted to my body I'll be blindsided by how absolutely wonderful it is. Right now I think of it as a creamy offwhite nightgown that I stole off some roman chick who's bigger than I. ARGH!!!
Monday, August 10, 2009
It's about time...and it's so unfair!!!
Ugh! So I write a blog about not blogging, then I don't blog for like a month!!! I'm sorry. I honestly didn't have much to blog about. Now I have a little story that I think is so unfair! And please read through before you start thinking WHAT A BITCH!!! The way the story starts out is not the unfair part...you'll understand when you get there.
So today I found out that a close friend, we'll call her Friend J is newly engaged. There is all the hurrahs, hurrays and hurrohs that go with it. In the midst of it I'm harassing her about the headaches of wedding planning. Okay ppl, my point here is that when a friend is newly prego we hear from all our parent friends all about the sleepless nights, dirty diapers, puke, temper tantrums, and endless crying that we just signed ourselves up for. There ARE those points to being a parent but there's always so much more and you end up loving it (unless you are a cold unfeeling person in which case...stop reading my blog!). It's like wedding planning...it's a headache and work but it's still some fun and it indulges your inner girliness. No matter how many horror stories we hear about babies and weddings we're still gonna do it! Anywho a friend of ours, Friend S was saying maybe don't discourage her this easily. She has a point but the truth is I think Friend J could plan something in the middle of a hurricane. Seriously though, she's thought about the kinda wedding she's wanted for a long time so I think she pretty much was waiting for the guy and all she needs now is to make the reservations. She met that guy, now she'll pull out her phone list and have it done in a jiffy. I envy her. Now the unfair part comes into play.
She's planning a destination wedding. That's awesome and great and have no issues with her wanting that. The thing is I can envision her wedding! If she was having a normal old wedding I know what kind of gown she should pick and how she should wear her hair. I see her in a white not ivory gown that is fitted in the bust, slightly less fitted through the torso but not as loose as an A-line, with a slight fullness in the skirt (not a full out ball gown skirt, but just like a couple layers of crinoline underneath to give it some volume). This dress would be adorned with crystals surrounding the bust and the hem with more adorning slightly higher in the back part of her skirt, maybe mid calf. She'd wear probably opera length gloves and her hair would be up and back and would fall in a cascade of curls starting slightly at the top of her head from her tiara or partial tiara hair comb and falling down her back. I can't picture her whole bouquet but I do see calla lilies involved.
I've ordered my dress but fear that once I get it I'm not gonna like it. I still have NO idea what to do with my hair, let alone what to put in it. I do have my flowers for my bouquet but I'm second guessing them. Why can I see a big part of hers so clearly and my own not at all??? lol It's SO unfair!!! Friend J, if you decide on changing your plans you could hire me as your planner...apparently I have your wedding all worked out. Now if only I could decide on mine!!!
So today I found out that a close friend, we'll call her Friend J is newly engaged. There is all the hurrahs, hurrays and hurrohs that go with it. In the midst of it I'm harassing her about the headaches of wedding planning. Okay ppl, my point here is that when a friend is newly prego we hear from all our parent friends all about the sleepless nights, dirty diapers, puke, temper tantrums, and endless crying that we just signed ourselves up for. There ARE those points to being a parent but there's always so much more and you end up loving it (unless you are a cold unfeeling person in which case...stop reading my blog!). It's like wedding planning...it's a headache and work but it's still some fun and it indulges your inner girliness. No matter how many horror stories we hear about babies and weddings we're still gonna do it! Anywho a friend of ours, Friend S was saying maybe don't discourage her this easily. She has a point but the truth is I think Friend J could plan something in the middle of a hurricane. Seriously though, she's thought about the kinda wedding she's wanted for a long time so I think she pretty much was waiting for the guy and all she needs now is to make the reservations. She met that guy, now she'll pull out her phone list and have it done in a jiffy. I envy her. Now the unfair part comes into play.
She's planning a destination wedding. That's awesome and great and have no issues with her wanting that. The thing is I can envision her wedding! If she was having a normal old wedding I know what kind of gown she should pick and how she should wear her hair. I see her in a white not ivory gown that is fitted in the bust, slightly less fitted through the torso but not as loose as an A-line, with a slight fullness in the skirt (not a full out ball gown skirt, but just like a couple layers of crinoline underneath to give it some volume). This dress would be adorned with crystals surrounding the bust and the hem with more adorning slightly higher in the back part of her skirt, maybe mid calf. She'd wear probably opera length gloves and her hair would be up and back and would fall in a cascade of curls starting slightly at the top of her head from her tiara or partial tiara hair comb and falling down her back. I can't picture her whole bouquet but I do see calla lilies involved.
I've ordered my dress but fear that once I get it I'm not gonna like it. I still have NO idea what to do with my hair, let alone what to put in it. I do have my flowers for my bouquet but I'm second guessing them. Why can I see a big part of hers so clearly and my own not at all??? lol It's SO unfair!!! Friend J, if you decide on changing your plans you could hire me as your planner...apparently I have your wedding all worked out. Now if only I could decide on mine!!!
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
I missed you!!!
I've swore that I'd blog nightly, even felt guilty about missing those 2 days last week, then I never entered again. Tis the life! Sorry, sorry...I'm not avoiding you, I think I'm trying to avoid the wedding.
Things have started full tilt. Got the planner, been dress peeking (maybe even tried a couple on...okay so there's one I fell in love with already), looked at invitations, and possible floral arrangements. The wedding beast has been set free and he's definitely on the loose. A private ceremony and dinner with family and friends who choose to come has developed into a full blown wedding! You'd be quick to point the finger at Bridezilla...but alas, there's no monster yet! It seems the monster developing is Father of the Bridezilla! He's not a monster, but he had other plans for the wedding that weren't exactly my vision but am tailoring my vision into it...and beating my dear loving fiance into submission to follow the my wishes which are following the wishes of another person. Thank god he loves me so..at least he will for probably the next 6 months, then start praying for his life to end or me to fall down a long set of stairs in the final three.
Things have started full tilt. Got the planner, been dress peeking (maybe even tried a couple on...okay so there's one I fell in love with already), looked at invitations, and possible floral arrangements. The wedding beast has been set free and he's definitely on the loose. A private ceremony and dinner with family and friends who choose to come has developed into a full blown wedding! You'd be quick to point the finger at Bridezilla...but alas, there's no monster yet! It seems the monster developing is Father of the Bridezilla! He's not a monster, but he had other plans for the wedding that weren't exactly my vision but am tailoring my vision into it...and beating my dear loving fiance into submission to follow the my wishes which are following the wishes of another person. Thank god he loves me so..at least he will for probably the next 6 months, then start praying for his life to end or me to fall down a long set of stairs in the final three.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
My salvation
So I've recently taken a few days off. It was my fiance's birthday and I just didn't feel much like planning. Kept on with the parenting but the son hasn't done much besides decides to make sounds like a man possessed while being fed. I think he gets that from his dad.
Anywho...because the planning was getting a little stressful and things not quite working out how I imagined, I started thinking...is this the right decision??? Fate seems like she's doing her damnedest to keep us from achieving our goals, so maybe there's a reason. Well my friends, I've come to a decision.
Last night we were watching the moving, Gran Torino. At the end I started to cry, if you don't cry at the end there's something wrong, but I didn't do the movie weep...I started CRYING!!! My fiance bends down to me, takes both my hands in his, leans forward and says to me..."don't worry, Clint Eastwood is still alive". Right there, fate be damned...I was sure I made the right decision.
Anywho...because the planning was getting a little stressful and things not quite working out how I imagined, I started thinking...is this the right decision??? Fate seems like she's doing her damnedest to keep us from achieving our goals, so maybe there's a reason. Well my friends, I've come to a decision.
Last night we were watching the moving, Gran Torino. At the end I started to cry, if you don't cry at the end there's something wrong, but I didn't do the movie weep...I started CRYING!!! My fiance bends down to me, takes both my hands in his, leans forward and says to me..."don't worry, Clint Eastwood is still alive". Right there, fate be damned...I was sure I made the right decision.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Last night attack of the imagination, today attack of technology
Okay, okay, okay!!! The fates are gonna drive me to spike my OJ with vodka at 12:15 in the afternoon!!!
After last night's fight with my dear friend sleep I thought I'd be faced with a break today...especially since I was taking a break from the planning. My son co-operated with the idea perfectly. He ate well, played well, went for his nap well. For once though, it's only my son who's on Team Mommy today.
First of all the kitchen is a disaster! Anyone who's a mother knows how hard it is to keep a clean house and anyone who knows me knows how hard it is for me to get the urge to clean. I've been good since the boy was born. Messes now annoy me, whereas I ignored them previously. So I set out to clean up my kitchen after breakfast. The son is playing well for me in his highchair (which he NEVER does while I'm cleaning the kitchen) and I load up the dishwasher and flick it on. There's a couple more to go in a second load (lack of dish soap, not laziness, to do them by hand) and I planned to get to them after this load. So I've done some this and that, the dishes are done and have cooled a bit by now...I pull open the dishwasher to load and unload and, TADA, there's the soap still sitting in the dispenser. *sigh* Here we go again...round 2 with load 1.
Being the good fiancee that I am and an even better mom I decided it would be a good idea to make something from our son for his dad's birthday tomorrow. After searching, searching, searching online for a perfect quote...I found a pic, edited the quote onto the pic and about to print it off. First off though, I have to fight with the paper tray to put photo paper in it...okay got it! Now I have to hook this computer up to the printer (it's a new comp). Should be no prob, right??? Well after about 30 mins Windows is still trying to find the proper driver and the printer has informed me that it's colors are low. If I ever get this computer to take this printer am I even gonna get a picture at all???
I need to pee but I'm scared to go to the bathroom. The way today is going, the toilet may swallow me whole. Now I'm wondering...is that such a bad thing???
After last night's fight with my dear friend sleep I thought I'd be faced with a break today...especially since I was taking a break from the planning. My son co-operated with the idea perfectly. He ate well, played well, went for his nap well. For once though, it's only my son who's on Team Mommy today.
First of all the kitchen is a disaster! Anyone who's a mother knows how hard it is to keep a clean house and anyone who knows me knows how hard it is for me to get the urge to clean. I've been good since the boy was born. Messes now annoy me, whereas I ignored them previously. So I set out to clean up my kitchen after breakfast. The son is playing well for me in his highchair (which he NEVER does while I'm cleaning the kitchen) and I load up the dishwasher and flick it on. There's a couple more to go in a second load (lack of dish soap, not laziness, to do them by hand) and I planned to get to them after this load. So I've done some this and that, the dishes are done and have cooled a bit by now...I pull open the dishwasher to load and unload and, TADA, there's the soap still sitting in the dispenser. *sigh* Here we go again...round 2 with load 1.
Being the good fiancee that I am and an even better mom I decided it would be a good idea to make something from our son for his dad's birthday tomorrow. After searching, searching, searching online for a perfect quote...I found a pic, edited the quote onto the pic and about to print it off. First off though, I have to fight with the paper tray to put photo paper in it...okay got it! Now I have to hook this computer up to the printer (it's a new comp). Should be no prob, right??? Well after about 30 mins Windows is still trying to find the proper driver and the printer has informed me that it's colors are low. If I ever get this computer to take this printer am I even gonna get a picture at all???
I need to pee but I'm scared to go to the bathroom. The way today is going, the toilet may swallow me whole. Now I'm wondering...is that such a bad thing???
My friend, Sleep, and I are in a bit of a fight
In my next life I really want to be a man! Not that I wanna sit on the couch, scratch, and burp (I do that regardless), I want their simplicity and ability to distance themselves from any situation.
I woke this morning, or rather dragged my ass, out of bed at 7 am with the regular summons from my little alarm clock who needs no batteries. Usually I'm groggy but functional but this fine particular morning nothing is functional. My mind is thick and sluggish and begging me to grab a pot of coffee and a straw. Yes, my friends, stress is creeping in and stealing my sleep from me. My stressors are divided between the sensical everyday stresses of life, and the non-sensical stresses of being a mother.
We may in the future be looking at a bit of a financial hit. Which anytime would be coverable but with trying to save for the upcoming nuptials, not so much fun. When is money fun though right??? Well besides when we're spending it frivolously, that seemed like a good idea at the time but leaves you full of regrets and a headache the next day, not unlike a hangover. Economics, future, health....these are all regular stresses and while a pain, are usually tolerable.
Once night hits, my neighbourhood takes on a side job....racetrack. You hear people driving like maniacs all over the place after 11 pm-ish. As I'm trying to find my comfortable spot in bed (I'm much like an animal who turns over and over and over then FINALLY falls asleep) I hear that the race has begun. Some invincible genius peels around the corner and burns down the street. Now I'm NOT even close to sleeping. My thoughts immediately turn to my son who's fast asleep in his crib in the next room. What if he'd been outside??? What could have happened??? At this point my friend, Sleep gets sick of being ignored and just gets up and leaves. I start thinking about what if one of these idiots hurt my precious baby??? I'd hate to have to hurt someone else's precious baby...but that's what it'd come down to if it was a show down between them and mine. I'm, over course, looking over the most obvious as my horrid daydream takes place...why would my son be outside playing on the street in the middle of the night??? This is non-sensical stress. The combination of the two caused me to ignore sleep and sleep, therefore, to ignore me.
Now getting back to why I wish I was a man. Through all this, my fiance is snoring away, oblivious to all. Why isn't he worried that a car is gonna spin out of control, crash through our house, go up the stairs, and take a left, and possible hurt our precious one??? Why isn't he obsessing over saving for our meager wedding??? It's because he's aware one's impossible and the other one can be worked around and at the end of it all...it doesn't matter. Which is why he's bounding around a kitchen right now and I'm fantasizing about a King named Sealy with his 500 thread-count Egyptian cotton robes. Ugh pass me the pot and a straw!!!
I woke this morning, or rather dragged my ass, out of bed at 7 am with the regular summons from my little alarm clock who needs no batteries. Usually I'm groggy but functional but this fine particular morning nothing is functional. My mind is thick and sluggish and begging me to grab a pot of coffee and a straw. Yes, my friends, stress is creeping in and stealing my sleep from me. My stressors are divided between the sensical everyday stresses of life, and the non-sensical stresses of being a mother.
We may in the future be looking at a bit of a financial hit. Which anytime would be coverable but with trying to save for the upcoming nuptials, not so much fun. When is money fun though right??? Well besides when we're spending it frivolously, that seemed like a good idea at the time but leaves you full of regrets and a headache the next day, not unlike a hangover. Economics, future, health....these are all regular stresses and while a pain, are usually tolerable.
Once night hits, my neighbourhood takes on a side job....racetrack. You hear people driving like maniacs all over the place after 11 pm-ish. As I'm trying to find my comfortable spot in bed (I'm much like an animal who turns over and over and over then FINALLY falls asleep) I hear that the race has begun. Some invincible genius peels around the corner and burns down the street. Now I'm NOT even close to sleeping. My thoughts immediately turn to my son who's fast asleep in his crib in the next room. What if he'd been outside??? What could have happened??? At this point my friend, Sleep gets sick of being ignored and just gets up and leaves. I start thinking about what if one of these idiots hurt my precious baby??? I'd hate to have to hurt someone else's precious baby...but that's what it'd come down to if it was a show down between them and mine. I'm, over course, looking over the most obvious as my horrid daydream takes place...why would my son be outside playing on the street in the middle of the night??? This is non-sensical stress. The combination of the two caused me to ignore sleep and sleep, therefore, to ignore me.
Now getting back to why I wish I was a man. Through all this, my fiance is snoring away, oblivious to all. Why isn't he worried that a car is gonna spin out of control, crash through our house, go up the stairs, and take a left, and possible hurt our precious one??? Why isn't he obsessing over saving for our meager wedding??? It's because he's aware one's impossible and the other one can be worked around and at the end of it all...it doesn't matter. Which is why he's bounding around a kitchen right now and I'm fantasizing about a King named Sealy with his 500 thread-count Egyptian cotton robes. Ugh pass me the pot and a straw!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)